ConverseχInverse Featuring Juliet Cook

ConverseχInverse is the result of Adam Tedesco attempting to interview people he admires, entirely in verse.

 

Talk to me about porno sandwiches

I was just reading a poem about that last night

I have a chapbook called Thirteen Designer Vaginas

And the reason I even got into creating that chapbook

Is because I read an article about vaginal rejuvenation surgery

And it seemed to be trending

I heard about how porn stars get vaginal rejuvenation surgeries

Then it became more main stream

Normal people started getting it done

Because they didn’t like the way that part of their body looked

They wanted it snip it or shrink it to make it more visually appealing

Even though sometimes these procedures damage that part of the body in terms of sensation

So apparently the visuals is more important than the sensations to some people

Somehow when I was researching this online I came upon a site

That was just image after image of before and after photos

Of women who had undergone vaginal rejuvenation surgery

And it would have a before and after but it’s also like looking at some porn magazine

I’m not a huge porn magazine person

But I’ve certainly flipped through a lot of them

To me it’s one of those things

When you look through the first few pages

Some of the visuals can be really appealing or interesting

But once you’ve looked through the entire magazine

It’s like vagina, vagina, vagina

It loses its appeal

That’s how it was looking at these before and after pictures

Of vaginal rejuvenation surgeries

It was like porn but also

Sometimes the before looked better than the after

I don’t know what started this

But for years

If I spend an extensive amount of time doing something

I also think of it as poetry research

And I made myself somewhat nauseated

Looking at so many photos of restructured vaginas

But then it inspired an entire chapbook

 

Is your mind a board game

No

 

If it was how would you play

I’ve never been a board game focused adult

Going back to childhood

I liked the game related to “Clue”

Which I think is an Agatha Christie book

With all these little rooms and weapons and criminals

So a board game version of my mind

Would probably involve different versions of me

Positive / Negative

Disturbing

Unbalanced

Logical / Illogical formats

 

Be careful

There are sharp things

The first thing that pops into my head is shark teeth

I remember when I was a little kid one of my sisters got a shark tooth stuck in her nose

That has incorporated itself into some of my poems including the recent one about shark teeth

 

I assume it wasn’t still in the shark’s mouth

No

We have an aunt that lives in Florida

I have three sisters and I’ve always interpreted things that happened in our childhood

More darkly than any of them did

I enjoyed the Florida experience but I just have a lot of bad memories

Of what my mom and her sister did with living creatures that they found on the beach

So that we could take their remnants home

They basically killed them

Not that they killed the shark

But that’s where the tooth came from

 

There are needles, nails, old dried hot glue

And scissors and little strangulated crevices

filled with goats milk that had gone rancid

 

Where horror finds us talking

In our dreams and visual art

And in our interpretations of what other people

Secretly think about us

 

I always dream about people with the wrong faces

I often dream about people with missing limbs

Or with no faces

 

 

What is the hardest dream to control by starving

Those dreams where you’re not sure that it’s a dream

Where you can’t wake yourself up

They could be the hardest or the easiest

Because if your stomach was grumbling

It could cause you to wake up

I don’t have these dreams often

Usually I don’t mind nightmares

Or violent dreams

Because I can make myself wake up

If it gets to a point a don’t like and find

Some lines of to use in poems later

Every once in a while I’ll have one of these dreams

Where I have trouble making myself wake up

And then I’ll think I did

I manage to open my eyes and get up

I’ll be walking around

But still feel really out of it

And uncomfortable

Then I’ll do something like walk up to the mirror

To see if anything about myself appears unusual

And I’ll be looking in the mirror and I won’t have any eyes

Just two holes where they should be

Then I’ll realize I’m dreaming

And they’ll be a whole other process

Of waking myself up

Moving my body round

That kind of thing

I had this awful dream

Usually the worst dreams

Are those that are violent and realistic

It involved a guy I dated

He told me something he was going to do to me

He used a word that I didn’t understand

So I asked him what it meant

He said it meant he was going to cut off me nipples

So then the dream is him getting out a knife and cutting off one of my nipples

And trying to pull the other one off

I was screaming

Why are you doing this

And he was punching me in the face

And he said

You think your stroke damaged your brain

Wait till I’m done with this

And then I made myself wake up

But certain lines and images kept repeating themselves

Sometimes when I have a dream like that

About a person I’ve had recent issues with

I’ll wonder if it’s a warning that

Something bad is going to happen next time I see them

 

What is real anyway?

I think everyone’s perception of reality differs

Even if you’re in the room with two other people

All three of you are going to perceive it differently

I think what is real depends on the individual perceiving

Unless there is a mental imbalance

Where you’re experiencing things that aren’t even in the room

So instead of realness being based on interpretation it’s based on imbalance

We all have mental fluctuations and quirks

Other than that

Things that are real are

Human body parts

Ghostly body parts floating by the ceiling fan

 

How do we dilate what we are

I guess

By choosing the words

And the structure of those words

And How we fuse together our lines

And forms of expression

Not necessarily words

Also visual

Whether paint, collage, hybrid, photos

The way we act and perceive others etc.

 

 

Can Robert Indiana feel more love then me?

NO

 

When time becomes crooked

The crookedness could be happening in a crazy creepy dream

Or the crookedness could be a small brain malfunction

It could relate to something more serious

Or perhaps if you’re able to focus elsewhere

Before it becomes even more crooked

Perhaps nothing bad will happen

This reminds me

When I was a little kid

I would

Out of nowhere

I’d be sitting on the floor coloring

At my grandmother’s house

And all of a sudden

I’d have this thing happen

Where it seemed that all of a sudden

The timeframe or the space of my mind

Would warp itself

It would be a sensation

A beeping

I remember it now in recent years

Because of side effects of a health issue

I occasionally have these mini seizures

And what often happens

If I’m on the brink of a seizure

All of a sudden

I’m doing something normal

And the sound of the room never really changes

But the sound changes in my mind

 

 

What don’t I know about chyme or blood

Even if you know how chyme smells

There’s really nothing mystical about chyme

Chyme the food product

As far as blood goes

Blood seems to filter through my mind

In a lot of different ways

And what you might not know about blood

If you have some type of extremely deep wound

The blood will come out in a purple color

More than red

I remember someone told me

If the wound was deep enough

The blood will come out purple

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Monster photo Dan me

Juliet Cook is a grotesque glitter witch medusa hybrid brimming with black, grey, silver, purple, and red explosions. Her poetry has appeared in a peculiar multitude of literary publications, recently including FLAPPERHOUSE, Ghost Proposal, H_NGM_N, ILK, and Menacing Hedge. She is the author of more than thirteen published poetry chapbooks, most recently including POISONOUS BEAUTYSKULL LOLLIPOP (Grey Book Press, 2013), RED DEMOLITION (Shirt Pocket Press, 2014) and a collaborative chapbook with Robert Cole, MUTANT NEURON CODEX SWARM (Hyacinth Girl Press, 2015). Another new collaborative chapbook by Juliet Cook and j/j hastain, Dive Back Down, is forthcoming from Dancing Girl Press later in 2015. Cook’s first full-length poetry book, “Horrific Confection” was published by BlazeVOX in 2008 and her second full-length poetry book, Malformed Confetti, is forthcoming from Crisis Chronicles Press later in 2015.   You can find out more at www.JulietCook.weebly.com.

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